When I started a job one time I was invited by a group to go to lunch with them. The group consisted of the family that basically owned and ran the company. They were the VP of Technology, President of the company, Senior Programmer, A/R Manager, etc. Meanwhile I was a Jr Programmer making peanuts.

They all decided on Thai food. Yuck. But I was in no position to say anything.

At the restaurant I was lucky enough.. yeah right.. to sit next to the president. She seemed like a nice lady. About my age. Hmm, me Jr Programmer and her president. You can see how good I was doing in my life.

Anyway, I ordered the smallest thing possible as my truck transmission blew the week before. I watched as she ordered the most expensive sushi on the menu. No biggie, if you can afford it.. eat it.

Then, the bill came. I didn’t get a look at it, but they all said put in your money. Not wanting to look cheap, I slid over $10. for my $4 bowl of soup and $1.95 coke.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw the president quickly toss in 2 singles. I didn’t think anything. Maybe one of her other family members owed her money or something and would pay the difference.

Well, they calculated the bill and came up $25 short. The A/R manager said, let’s make this easy, everyone toss in an extra $5.

 I about puked. Starting a new job, being broke and now sitting here with all the top people of the company. How was I going to get out of this one.

… I chickened out and just paid the extra $5 bucks.

In closing I would like to say that I never went to lunch with them again.

We work with this girl and we call her SuperStar. The reason is because she came running over to us one day and told us how she was going to be on American Idol next week. We all watched and she wasn’t on it.

When we started teasing her about it, she got all mad and stormed off.

But anyway, last week Superstar told us how she was sitting in the stall of the bathroom and a woman went to the stall next to her. Superstar watched as the woman faced the toilet like a man would. After a few minutes, her curiosity starting getting the best of her. She decided to climb on to the toilet and peek over the stall.

She climbed up and peered over at the woman. The woman slowly turned her head up as Superstar watched. After she saw Superstar looking over at her she shrieked, “Oh my god!” and ran out.

Superstar told us that the woman was in the stall throwing up.

The company I worked for a few years ago, hired this guy called Ron. He shared an office with a girl. After he was there for less than a week, the girl he shared the office found that she was missing a credit card. She didn’t know what happened to it, either she had missplaced it or if it had been stolen.

Then, a girl I worked with told me how she had seen Ron in Kmart the night before. She had called out to him. He looked right at her and sort of ran away. She told me how weird it was.

As the story unfolds, these two women in our office were talking and the girl mentioned seeing Ron in Kmart. The girl with the missing credit card stated how the credit card company reported a lot of charges from Kmart that same night on her credit card. They then went on the County website and searched Ron’s name. He was actually a fugitive wanted for some crimes including battery and robbery.

They called the sheriff’s department. Ron heard them and took off out of the building. He was pulling his car out of the parking lot as a sheriff blocked him in. We all watched from the windows of the office as Ron ran. It was funny! People in the office were yelling, “Run Ron! Run!”

It was great as Ron disappeared with the fat sheriff chasing him. After they were gone a while, we started to go back to our desks. That was when Ron showed up again without the sheriff on his tail. He had lost him. Ron tried to get in to his car again but his car wouldn’t start. Ron then got out again as more sheriff’s arrived. He then jumped a fence and was gone again.

Ron made the papers that next day. He was caught and charged with a ton of crimes including, assault on a police officer, credit card theft, etc etc.

We also checked the sheriff website a month later and saw his new picture. He was all beat up. It looked like the police beat him up pretty bad. Poor Ron.