CoWorkerStories

Have you ever wondered what your coworkers make?

Do you already know what your coworkers makes and want to publish it online?

This is the site for you www.coworkerSalaries.com. You can enter in the salaries of your coworkers and also see the already published salaries of your coworkers.

You can also search on the company and find out what they are paying their employees. Talk about a great negotiating tool!

What do you think about this? Should this be allowed on the Internet?

I worked in this company where they put me in a cubicle next to this, middle aged woman. Sorry I called her that.. but that is how I can best describe here. She was a real sweetheart too. She was from Texas and had that Texas drawl.

I would often hear her on the phone saying to people,”I would love to help you but my website is down.” This went on for the first week I worked there. I thought nothing of it. I just was wondering what kind of web hosting she had as that website really is down a lot.

One day she asked for my help. She comes over to my cubicle and says, “I was wondering if you could help me out. You are a technical guy right? I responded, “Sure, hopefully I can help you out.” She then said, “That is great because my website is down Mack (how she pronounced my name Mike) and I don’t know what to do.” I was like, “Geez. I am screwed now. I know nothing about her hosting company or code, or anything for that matter.”

I then started asking her, “Where is the site hosted?” She responded, “Not too sure Mack”. I said, “Uh ok. What is the user name and password?” She said, “Why do you need my password when my website is down?”

I didn’t know how to respond so I went to her computer and started trying to bring up the Internet on a browser. It could not connect. I then said, “Hmm, I can’t seem to get to the Internet, not sure what is going on with that, but I need to get on the net to diagnose your website issue.” She then said, “See, that is what I am talking about, my website is down Mack.”

At that point, it all became clear to me. Her Internet has been down for the past few week and she was saying her website was down! I called in someone from IT to help her out.

While the IT person diagnosed the issue, I was sitting there wondering what the heck she was up to for the past few week without an Internet connection!

            I don’t even know where to start, with this guy. If there was EVER a real person who embodied SNL style parody- this is him. In the words of another coworker “He’s that frail little F***.” His teeth are pointy and orange like candy corn. He’s got a disability due to a back injury. Ok that’s fine- something like that is not to be ridiculed- but he got this implant thing that sends an electric stimulus to help out the problem. When he returned to work after having this hardware upgrade, he wanted to “show it off” I guess ( mainly to female coworkers.) the device is somewhere around his hip, so to show it off he has to both pull up his shirt, and pull down his pants a little. All the while saying “Touch it.  No, right here. Feel that? It’s hard! Touch it, TOUCH IT!”

                        In our line of work, we often deal with the military, and military regulations. This guy is a retired _______ sergeant. I’m prior military, not retired- but im a vet. THIS guy throws around his RETIRED status like it means something. He had a problem where he was getting email for someone in the military with the same name as him. He Tracked them down, and asked them to change their email. During the conversation, he said “Well, you’re speaking to _________Sergeant RETIRED! So you WILL  resolve this!” ( or something to that effect). He will also “threaten” to call high ranking officers to resolve matters as well. ( he’s an entry- level employee here.)

                        When the boss here ( who knows his shit too, I might add)  is speaking- this dude will take the last 2-3 words the boss says, and repeat them back to him- as if to say “ You are going  right along with what I was just thinking…” It must work for him though- because when the rest of us braved “MANDATORY OVERTIME” This jerk was afforded the opportunity to work from home for O.T. for 3 hours a night. This guy didn’t even do 3 hours of work in 2-3 DAYS at the office. Every telephone call he handles is SO LOUD on his end, that you can hear him anywhere in the office. And its mainly him saying “Yeah. Yeah. Right. Right. Yeah. Right. No.Nonononononononono. Nuh-hooooooooooooo. Yeah. Right, right. Yeah, no, right.” The same applies to any conversation you have with him.

                        Did I mention the uncomfortably personal facts this guy will tell you? A few of my personal faves: His Daughters mysterious crotch-rash. (illustrated by pointing to his own crotch) The mysterious crotch rash HE now has. His 13 year old sons inability to stop wetting the bed. His sons FIRST erection. The bump on his sons privates, that only hurts when he has a boner. His ailing fathers porno collection, and male enhancement tablets. These nuggets are dispatched during his morning forum he holds in his cube he shares with 3 other people. It usually lasts 45 minutes. If anyone else has input, he is noticeably bored, and barely able to keep his eyes open.          

                        I am truly amazed at his sagelike wisdom in the face of adversity. The situations he (claims) ends up in. All his actions and responses are SO well balanced and thought out..

                        We have holiday buffets in our office. This scumbag was caught picking through the food with his dirty (nail bitten) fingers. He apologized ONLY after I ridiculed him in our team meeting by calling him an ape for doing so. Turns out that 50-some years doing so at home makes it “ok” for him to do so at work. He makes coffee in the office coffee machine, and I thought it was odd he stood there watching it drip. Then I realized he had his own cup under the spout letting it fill. Ok, that’s not so gross, as just plain weird.  

Here is an excerpt of dealing with my coworkers:

I’m not sure what’s harder, living with a non tech wife or working with non tech coworkers. The other day for example one of my favorite persons at work which will remain anonymous (she knows who she is) tells me that her printer is not working. “I’m not sure what’s wrong, I press print, but nothing comes out of the printer”, she says. “I’ll check it out in a while”, I say. Later she comes to me and says she fixed the problem. I ask what she did to fix it. She says, “The printer needed paper.” Doh!

You can see the rest of the story at: http://macnwin.wordpress.com

I work with someone who has to be hands down the biggest assh*le in america. His job is in shipping (loading and unloading trucks) but for some reason he spends around 4 hours a day (out of an 8 hour day) in my area. How he gets away with this I have no idea, but anyway every time you get near him he either burps or farts (I guess he thinks this is amusing in some way) and he tells people outsde of work he is the “warehouse manager” a postion that does not even exist. He is constantly moving stuff around in my work area with his forklift for no logical reason other than to just spend more time in an area which he has no reason being in. I could go on and on about this tool but I’ll end it at that.

I work for the freakin Boss FROM HELL! This guy is completely nuts and out of his mind. I am locked in to this job because I have to survive to eat. I cannot believe how he belittle’s me every day in front of everyone and he oftentimes yells to complete his point. If only our corporate owners knew what the hell is going on in this office. How can I get revenge on this guy without losing my job!!!

I used to work at a company where the Project Manager was the guy who actually managed the project from start to finish. He used his experience and knowledge to help guide the project correctly and to completion. Now I work at a place where the project manager just harasses people so that they complete their projects on the project list. Is this what he is supposed to do? He works for our tech company and is completely non technical. He knows nothing techical, doesn’t know how to check the project to see that it was done correctly. He just walks around harassing people by getting timelines, etc on projects. When he is not doing that, he is hanging out in the kitchen talking to whoever he finds and explaining endlessly to them how hard he is working. AHHHHHHHHH!!!

Of all the undesireables at the US Labor Department, the pathetic macho-man wannabee named Dave Meyer takes the cake.  Dave is a skinny, short little Napoleon.  If only he were six feet tall he would really whip the world. Alas and alack, Dave is a mealy runt with one kidney and no back-bone who thinks telling racial and ethinic “jokes” in the office and making unwanted sexual advances at women makes him big and strong.  Dave is a Senior Executive Service, which means he gets paid about $150,000 a year.  But don’t mistake the pay with any qualifications.  Dave got the job because his mother-in-law had ties to the Administration and got him in so he would be able to support his family.  I call that feeding off the common trough.

Recently I screwed up an email while I was away on a business trip. I was using the companies web email and received a notice from the Administrative Assistant. I clicked the ‘Reply’ Button to answer the email. In the email I put information that I only wanted the Administrative Assistant, my friend, to see. After writing the email, I clicked the send button. As the email was sending, I found that the entire employee roster was on the email. I tried to stop it, but it was too late.

Not being all too familiar with the companies web mail system, I unintentionally had clicked the ‘Reply All’ button and had to face the music of sending the entire company personal information in the email.

Nice job.

Do you have any coworker email stories? Respond to this post, I would love to hear some.